Sitting on the dock of the bay

My depression has been at bay. A new job with no stress, a marriage to a wonderful man and time to myself have kept me content for the most part. My obsession with New York is still an issue, but mainly for the the magazine industry that I'd like to get into rather than the place itself. I've been thinking about my "big picture goals" as Julie Morgenstern puts it and one of them is to begin my own Christian magazine for single and career women. Therefore, in looking at ways to achieve my goal, really, I don't need to work at a major magazine in NY (although, I'd love to). There are three major magazines in the Philadelphia area that I can work with and I'd like to do whatever I can to pursue one of them. I'm learning to modify my goals to make them work for my location and my marriage. Living in New York is no longer realistic and I need to let go of that dream - mainly because my husband hates New York and all things mass transit. But it is realistic for me to consider living in a suburban area with access to New York City: my husband will be content in the suburbs and I'd be more than happy to work in my favorite city in the world. Modifying my goals is something I will consistently need to do, especially when I have kids. (!!!) We have found a new apartment about two minutes from the train station and 10 minutes from the hubby's job. It's quite convenient. The location saves both of us gas, parking fees, sleep and all sorts of other assorted things. It's a bit pricey but well worth it when we think of why we made this move. We spend a lot of time together now - just enough to satisfy the both of us - are able to do the things that we want to do and have a life we enjoy. I can honestly say that I enjoy my life now. Things don't always work out the way I want and sure I get sad about things, but I haven't been depressed in some time. But external circumstances are working in my favor and I tend to perk up when external circumstances are status quo. I'm also attempting to overcome fear. I'm trying to take risks - as small as picking up the phone and calling for an appointment with a doctor I've never seen. I'm trying to organize a group in the Philadelphia area of young media professionals. The main chapter is in NY (of course) but there are small chapters around the country and I'm spearheading Philly's! I've prepared myself for major turnover since I'm so close to NY but I'll never know if it will work if I don't try. (My lame attempt at social networking.) I'm hoping to revamp my blog's layout. I don't know many blogspot pages with three-column layouts but that's what I'll shoot for. In the meantime, I've updated the "Resources" links. Commentary on depression-related news to come soon... P.S. The Madonna concert at Madison Square Garden last week was simply excellent. I enjoyed myself despite walking through torrential downpours to get there.